An individual’s problems with adjustment can be more clearly understood in the context of his/her interaction with others. Because we define ourselves in relation to other people, we know the ‘sense of self’‘ is constantly being created through those interactions. This is especially true when you take into consideration that person’s patterns of connection with loved ones. When love is expressed and accepted, it is the logical antidote to the helplessness and the sense of being disconnected and betrayed, which are at the core of countless traumatic experiences. Studies (1) show that, when a spouse is included in the treatment for anxiety, rates raised from 42% of therapeutic success (in individual therapy) to almost double, at 82% of success when both spouses are involved. It is only sensible then to make the most out of this healing element in everyone’s life (relationships) and use it as part of the treatment of trauma.
Healthy close relationships have been linked to resilience in combat situations, to the ability to cope with chronic stress and illness, and even to immune system competence. Because many traumas are marked by violations of human connections, the relationship with one’s life-partner is powerfully corrective, but it is often overlooked by health professionals as an active source of healing. Therapists who work with couples and families endeavor to create more positive connections between family members / husband and wife, where wounds can be healed utilizing those relationships as therapeutic catalysts. If you or someone you know is struggling from a traumatic experience or living with anxiety and needs healing, call (or fill out the online form) today. You CAN take the first step towards a healthier and fuller life.
(1) Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy with Trauma Survivors, by Susan Johnson
I recently heard from a friend she thinks Christians who have emotional wounds should not seek psychotherapy/counseling because doing so would be due to a lack of trust in God’s healing. This conversation got me wondering how so many Christians have acquired this prejudice against, not all health care services, but only that specifically related to mental health. As we continued talking about this subject, it came up that, when believers break a leg or discover they have diabetes or cataract, there usually is no second guessing the decision to go to the doctor and receive some kind of therapeutic intervention. To be treated by health care professionals is the logical and responsible thing to do when your physical health is compromised. However, when it comes to an invisible injury that affects emotional and psychological functioning, so many believe that prayer is the only true step towards healing Christians should take. The distinction between the two attitudes is intriguing to me, and it is also sad because it is hard to see fellow believers living with emotional pain for years (even decades) without seeking professional help that could bring an end to their (often secret) misery. It almost seems like there shame in asking for help, but it is actually in line with our Christian belief to do so, as it is a sign of humility.
